just a different place

- excerpts from Emily Perl Kingsley's "welcome to holland" -

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability.. It's like this..

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy.. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

pruning

We go through life
and forget how quickly
and quietly it is passing away.

We mouth words of love
and reject it by how we live…

We experience so much personal
and social evil and continue to live
as though evil is non-existent
and keep God’s grace at arms length.

We witness the beauty of creation
without raising our hearts and mind
in grateful contemplation.

We get bored by the company we keep
yet run away from silence and solitude.

We talk endlessly with one another
yet hear only meaningless sounds.

We go through a thousand experiences
yet fail to learn and grasp life’s meaning.

- Fr Guido Arguelles, SJ excerpts -

feeling and healing

feelings are symptoms that need to be heard. they carry an important message if we listen to them. feelings that don't get heard fuel addictions..

in my decision making, i still follow my highest values, not my noisiest emotions

conflicts are normal. but when they become prolonged and unresolved, they can cause burnout..

healing your burnout by changing your environment won't solve your problems if your burnout has internal causes

healing low self-worth and taming fears is a life long process

take time to care for yourself

laughter = inner jogging

dream sleep takes care of our mental fatigue

respect your body. befriend it. and be keenly sensitive to its quiet messages..

look for patterns in your day or week where you could get exercise

always try to find new ways of expressing love


- excerpts from simplify and live the good life by bo sanchez -

happy reminders

1. Notice What’s Right
Take all that life throws out you and reframe it with what’s right about the situation.

2. Be Grateful

3. Remember the Kid You Were

4. Be Kind

5. Spend Time with Your Friends

6. Savor Every Moment

7. Rest

8. Move!

9. Put on a Happy Face
Sometimes we have to fake it until we make it. I’m not suggesting that we not be honest, real or authentic, but I’m suggesting, sometimes, we just need to put on a happy face and keep moving forward. Researchers claim that smiling and looking like we are happy will indeed make us happier.

10. Pursue Your Goals
a life full of passion and enthusiasm

11. Finding Your Calling
having a sense of purpose

12. Get into the Flow

13. Play to Your Strengths
One way to achieve flow is by understanding and identifying our strengths and core values, and then begin to use these every day.

14. Don’t Overdo It
What gives you joy and happiness the first time may not work the second time. Set healthy and reasonable boundaries for yourself

http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/14-timeless-ways-to-live-a-happy-life/
- alex blackwell -

tension of opposites

life is a series of pulls back and forth.

you want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else.

something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn't.

you take certain things for granted, even when you know that you should never take anything for granted.

a tension of opposites, likes a pull on a rubber band. and most of us live somewhere in the middle.

which side wins?

love wins. love always wins.

- tuesdays with morrie -